


All I Want For Christmas Is.... You?

by GreyGullHaven



Series: GreyGullHaven's Holiday Collection [2]
Category: Haven (TV)
Genre: Duke/Nathan/Audrey, Friends With Benefits, Haven TV, Holidays, Multi, Other, Something More, Threesome - F/M/M, christimas, three gulls
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-27
Updated: 2020-11-27
Packaged: 2021-03-09 22:34:47
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 3,159
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27743818
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/GreyGullHaven/pseuds/GreyGullHaven
Summary: AU Story:  Troubles have never existed and Haven is a fairly normal quiet town. Duke, Nathan, and Audrey have been friends for years.  They are getting together with a few other friends from town for a party.  Nathan and Audrey have an established relationship and it is also well known that Duke has always had a special relationship with them both, though nothing serious- as Duke prefers. But this year things are different. Duke finds himself wanting just one thing this holiday season- a closer relationship. But with which one of them?
Relationships: Duke Crocker/Audrey Parker/Nathan Wuornos
Series: GreyGullHaven's Holiday Collection [2]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2034799
Comments: 10
Kudos: 9
Collections: AO3 Haven Facebook December Challenge: Holidays Smutmas Awareness and Prevention 2020





	1. All I Want For Christmas Is You

Three Gulls Story for Nathan Wuornos, Duke Crocker, and Audrey Parker- All I Want For Christmas is You?


	2. Chapter 2

With the annoyingly cheerful tunes playing over the radio, laughter filling the air, and the smells of the holidays filling the room, the party was well underway. The gift exchange had just ended and Duke couldn't help but keep a smile off his face as he watched Nathan struggle with the Santa costume. As quiet and reserved as he was, Nathan would always make a far better Santa Clause than he ever could. 

"You at least have some happy memories to pull from, Nathan," Duke muttered to himself as he watched Audrey come to his rescue, helping him get the oversized coat off. "Your mom always made sure the holidays were at least tolerable for you... which is more than what could be said for mine..."

_Duke's mind drifted back, against his best efforts to control it, to a less happy Christmas that would forever be cemented in his mind. There was no cheerful decoration or a beautiful tree. No carolers singing outside and no holiday music playing on the radio. No friendly faces could be seen and no cheerful voices could be heard. Instead, there was the soul-chilling winter air that filled the alleyway. There was the repulsive yet alarmingly addictive smell of the sweet smoke that still lingered heavily in the air around him. The only sound he could hear, over the deafening pounding of his heart, was the clattering of his teeth as he shivered uncontrollably. All around was the filth and squalor that was common in that part of town. Head back against the cold brick wall, he wrapped his arms around his trembling form and the numbness began to fade and the pain crept back into his consciousness all too easily. Closing his eyes, Duke wished that he could be somewhere else, anywhere else, at that moment. He wished with every fiber of his soul that when he opened his eyes again, he would wake up from the nightmare he was trapped in._

Duke was snapped out of his memories and thrust abruptly back to reality when he felt a hand on his arm and a familiar voice fill his mind, chasing away the dark memories. Blinking away the haze of the past he looked up at the worried face of Audrey who was sitting on the couch beside him.

"Oh hey... sorry, Audrey" he muttered, forcing a weak smile as he leaned over and picked up the half-empty glass from the table in front of him.

"You alright, Duke?" she asked, her voice and eyes full of concern, knowing this wasn’t exactly his favorite time of year.

"Yeah. Never better," Duke muttered as he downed the contents of the glass with a sigh, avoiding eye contact as he fought to get his emotions under control.

_"Get it together" scolded himself mentally as he took a deep breath. "You are NOT going to mess this up for Audrey or for Nathan. You know they have been looking forward to this all year. Do not fuck this up!"_

"I can feel your angst from here Duke, stop the bullshitting," Nathan said as he sat down on the other side and put a hand on his friend's shoulder. "What's going on, Duke? Talk to us."

"Nothing's wrong ok? Nothing's going on," Duke said, trying to sound casual but even he could hear the edge in his voice and he couldn't stop his hands from shaking ever so slightly. "I just need another drink..." he muttered as he stood and walked towards the makeshift bar that had been set up for the party.

As he left Nathan and Audrey exchanged looks as Nathan slid over and sat next to her. Audrey sighed sadly as she leaned her head against Nathan's shoulder as they both watched Duke from across the room.

"Why does he have to be such a stubborn pain in the ass all the time?" Nathan said as he tossed the Santa costume that was still in his hands onto the table. "He does a terrible job at hiding what he's feeling. It’s like he is screaming for help and then pushes anyone away when they try."

"It's just how Duke is,” Audrey said softly. “I don’t think he even realizes how badly he’s crying out for help most of the time. And he’s so used to being forgotten and abandoned he’s overcompensating with everything. You know better than most how much he's been through." 

"I know..." Nathan said as he pulled Audrey close and wrapped his arms around her. "If he just wasn't so hard-headed, he would know he doesn't have to deal with this alone. He has us after all... Just wish he would see what’s right in front of him."

"Then we are just going to have to help him see it," Audrey said with a sad yet determined sigh. 

Across the room, Duke grabbed one of the beer bottles out of the cooler and stood by the window. Taking a drink, he paused and absentmindedly looked out at the lightly falling snow and the brightly colored lights that adorned the streets outside. As he stood leaning against the window frame, Duke's hands slipped absent indeed into his pocket. Pulling it out he looked down at the ugly Christmas tie that lay crumpled up in his hand. With a somewhat disgusted laugh, he stared at it a moment as he thought back to the gift exchange. 

Buying a gift for a random person he had drawn for blindly the week before was not his idea of a great way to spend the frantic days leading up to the party, and Duke had been dreading the gift exchange- as much for the loathing of having to get a gift from a random person as for having to give one as well. He had at least been lucky enough to have drawn Dwight's name so he at least knew the guy he was buying for. He hadn't been so lucky on the receiving end, that much was obvious.

_"Can't really blame him" Duke thought to himself as he shoved the tie back into his pocket. "Poor Roberts doesn't know you from Adam, so how was he supposed to know pretty much anything would have been better than a tie...really though how many people would know what you would have wanted?" Duke laughed softly as he finished the beer and turned, gazing across the room that was still bustling with activity. "... how many of them even know you at all? Haven's been your home for most of your life, yet how many people even care enough to know who you are?"_

_Duke shook his head as he made his way back to the cooler and grabbed another bottle out, brushing away the ice from the bottle. As he stood, he looked around the room again and sighed._

_"But that's how you prefer it, isn't it?" the voice in his head whispered. "You're a Crocker after all. You don't need anyone else. You don't want anyone else. You prefer to be the loner. It's your style” he thought as he is eyes fell on Nathan and Audrey who were still sitting together on the couch on the other side of the room. He gave a sad smile as the voice in his head shifted slightly._

_“They are the only ones who understand you, who get you, who do more than tolerate you. As a Crocker, that is more than you deserve… yet Nathan and Audrey still treat you like you are special, needed, wanted even. And wanted for something more than just a good time too. Sure, it started out as just sex, nothing more nothing less, a shared kink they were willing to include you in on. Though you never asked for it to be anything more than that, you can’t deny you have noticed the change.”_

_Duke sighed softly, feeling his stomach start to churn with that feeling that was becoming more and more familiar. That mix of uneasiness and longing. That maddening blend of being content with how things were yet still being unable to deny that deep down he hoped that he wasn’t just imagining things. It has started out small, and went almost undetected at first- a softer tone to what words Nathan did say… more attentive looks from Audrey that seemed to see right past his usual mask… requests posed in ways that put him in control… and most recently there had been several instances where Duke could have sworn they actually cared about him outside of the bedroom. It was a new idea and feeling…. The idea of being wanted and the feeling of being cared for… and he knew he was struggling to deal with that. And the thought of not being in control in those moments absolutely terrified him._

_**_

Duke's thoughts were still on Nathan and Audrey as he watched them for a moment as they sat together talking. Nathan's arm was around Audrey as she sat snuggled up against him, looking like the perfect couple. For a brief moment, Duke felt a twinge of longing as he watched them, before quickly pushing the feeling down as he exhaled slowly, trying to calm the churning inside. Catching Audrey's gaze as she looked his way, she motioned for him to come back and join them and Duke fought to keep that tiny flicker of hope from igniting once again somewhere deep inside as he walked over towards his lovers slowly, weaving his way through the crowd that was still gathered.

"Why such a long face?" Nathan asked as he slid over on the couch, making room for Duke when he rejoined them. 

"Guess I'm just not feeling the holiday spirit yet," Duke mumbled as he started to sit down but was stopped by Audrey who slid over as well, leaving the only space on the couch for Duke to sit being between the two of them.

"Really you two?" Duke said with a slight grin as he shook his head and looked at them.

He appreciated how hard they tried to make sure he felt included, wanted, and needed. It wasn't the most conventional of relationships they had but it had worked out so far. Nathan and Audrey seemed happy and he had been content to keep things to the friends with benefits status. At least he had been....he wasn't too sure now, and he had to wonder if Audrey and Nathan felt the same at all or if he was just imagining things and putting his own deepest desires and longing too front and center. Was he just interpreting their actions to fulfill some pitiful fantasy he had of ever actually being wanted and needed for anything more than just sex?

"Stop standing there brooding like a moody teenager and your ass on this couch," Nathan said, breaking Duke’s thoughts again as he grabbed his hand and pulled him towards the couch and down between them.

"Ok, ok, fine!" Duke said with a laugh as he threw his hands up in defeat as he plopped down on the cushion.

With a proud smirk, Nathan shifted slightly and put his arm around Duke's shoulders as Audrey leaned closer and rested her head against Duke's shoulder and nuzzled against the side of his neck slightly. Duke felt himself tense slightly as he sat there for a moment, almost afraid to move. Snuggles and cuddles were not something he was used to, not in any of the many storied relationships he had had… but this was something Nathan and Audrey did quite often, so it kind of came with the terms of their relationship and what they had going on. And though he had fought hard to keep himself from admitting it, Duke could no longer deny that he liked it, and that he often found himself seeking out those little touches. He was equally surprised when he finally admitted that he enjoyed the small quiet moments that they often shared. It was all so new to him… and in many ways, it absolutely delighted him. With a soft smile, Duke gave an appreciative nod to Nathan and smiled down at Audrey as she snuggled closer.

"Relax and enjoy yourself, Duke..." she whispered as she leaned in closer with a gentle kiss on his cheek. 

"We can head out in a little while if you still want to," Nathan said, giving Duke's shoulder a reassuring squeeze.

Duke nodded silently, finding himself at a loss for words at that moment. As he relaxed slowly, Duke found himself leaning into Nathan's supportive embrace as Audrey curled up against his chest, wrapping her arms around him. For a moment he didn't dare move, afraid that if he breathed too hard or made any sudden move the moment would be gone, the simple perfectness of that moment lost. With a smile unconsciously spreading across his face, Duke’s body relaxed finally and his mind was still and quiet at last. Duke let himself get lost in the feelings that were washing over him, the memories forgotten for a time, as he allowed himself to enjoy the moment in all of its simple perfection.

Who knew.... Maybe this would be the year his luck would change and he would get what he had been searching for all that time, even without knowing it. Maybe this year he would finally have a reason to enjoy the holidays for a change. Maybe this year would end on an even better note.

**

Duke had managed to last a couple more hours before the restlessness took hold of him again. By then the party was already starting to wind down, so he didn't feel as guilty about pulling Nathan and Audrey away. He had offered to head out on his own so they could stay a little longer, but of course, neither of them would hear of it. Duke had to admit that through the slight twinges of guilt, he felt a certain level of comfort knowing they cared that much about him to make sure he was going to be ok.

As they made their way towards the harbor and to the Cape Rouge, since it was 'the best bed in all of Haven' according to Nathan, Duke was struck once again by how lucky he was to have actually found not one, but two people who truly did seem to care about him. And it had proven to not just be sympathy that motivated Audrey and Nathan. Sure, they were more reserved at times in public, but they were that way with each other even. But now as they walked the empty and quiet streets of Haven, the Christmas Eve air cool and crisp on that clear night, Duke could not deny that the three of them had grown closer over the last few years.

Finally alone, and with every step getting them closer to where they truly wanted to be, Duke smiled as Nathan reached out and took his hand in his, lacing their fingers together as they walked. It was a small gesture but one that always hit Duke hard. Nathan wasn't necessarily shy about public displays of affection but it usually took the form of a hand or arm around the shoulder. Holding hands was Nathan's more intimate and personal way of showing his affection, and Duke had found himself looking for it more and more often recently. Flashing a smile at Nathan, he tightened his grip as he turned and looked down at Audrey with a soft laugh. Head resting against his shoulder, hand in his, her arms wrapped around his tightly, she clung to him as she shivered slightly against the cool breeze that had picked up suddenly.

"You going to make it, Audrey?" Duke teased softly as he leaned over and kissed the top of her head softly. 

"Let's just get there ok?" she said as she shivered again. "Less talk, more walk."

Nathan and Duke laughed as they quickened their pace, soon finding themselves at their preferred home away from home. There was a certain degree of convenience with Duke's boat being their default destination most of the time. It was easy to get to, always available, and Nathan was absolutely correct when he said it had the biggest and most comfortable bed in all of Haven. 

**

With a pile of quickly discarded and forgotten clothes piled on the floor in the doorway, the three lovers took full advantage of the oversized bed that was there waiting for them. With doors locked and secured, they were in their own little world, and Duke no longer tried to deny that it was everything he ever wanted and needed as his lovers declared he was getting at least part of his present early. It had not taken long and all of Duke’s wondering and internal torturous musing were silenced and Duke, at last, started to let himself believe that maybe he wasn’t imaging things at all.

"Feel good?" Nathan asked, knowing all too well what the answer was. The way Duke was responding made it all too clear just how good he felt.

Laying there on his stomach, stretched out in the bed, Duke's head rested on the pillow in Audrey's lap as she gently ran her fingers through his hair. Nathan knelt behind him, strong yet surprisingly gentle hands working on the tight muscles of his shoulders and back. Between the deep massage and the feeling of Nathan’s calloused hands and the feather-light gentle caresses from Audrey, Duke couldn't hold back the soft moan of pleasure that escaped his lips. Whatever he had done to deserve this, for once he wasn't going to argue with fate. As he lay there, feeling truly relaxed and at peace for the first time in far too long, Duke smiled contently.

"We love you, Duke," Audrey whispered softly, her fingers gently caressing the side of his face.

"And we always will," Nathan added as he ran his hands slowly down Duke's lower back.

Duke moaned in reply, muttering softly as his body trembled slightly at the touch and the words from his lovers. While it was still an odd feeling for him to accept that he was on the receiving end of so much care and attention at that moment, Duke couldn't help but accept that Nathan and Audrey felt the same about him as he did for them. Maybe there was something more forming between them. All he knew was if they were willing to pursue it, he was not about to say no. Not by a long shot.

Duke moaned softly again as he felt himself surrender the last shred of resistance and drifted off to the feel of his lover’s touch and the sound of their voices.

“Love you, Audrey… Love you too, Nathan…”


End file.
